Akira: Please Don't Let Hollywood Screw This One Up

This is Shotaro Kaneda, the lead character of the 1988 anime Akira. Contrary to popular belief, Akira himself doesn't play a big role in Akira - though he is central to the storyline.
Kaneda is the leader of a biker gang called The Capsules in the city of Neo-Tokyo (built just across the way from the crater that used to be "old school Tokyo"). It is established within the movie that Kaneda and the rest of the Capsules are students of a school for juvenile delinquents under 15 years old.

A few years ago, Warner Bros. along with another production company owned by Leonard DiCaprio purchased the rights to turn Akira into a big budget live action Hollywood feature, with DiCaprio himself in the role of Kaneda. I thought that this was a strange decision, but there was a time when DiCaprio could pass for a 14 year old... granted, that time was 1997. In fact, if this movie had happened back then, it could have been just the role Leo was looking for to prove that he was more than just the pretty boy love interest - an image he got himself by making Romeo + Juliet and Titanic back to back. And what's more, it could have been the runaway hit that The Matrix was by beating that movie to the punch. Anyway, a few years has past, and it seems that DiCaprio isn't involved in the project any more. Hollywood bosses seem to have decided that without Leo, the role should go to an already established big name actor... the names talked about so far? James Franco and Brad Pitt....


Here's James Franco... not going to be passing for a 14 year old any time soon, is he.

But is there anyone who could be worse in the role of a 14 year old biker gang leader than the 47 year old Brad Pitt?


Really Hollywood? I suppose there is an argument that can be made about the scripts being written to make the characters older, but then the counter-argument is this... that is not Akira! The story is about ultimate unlimited power in the hands of some serious teenage angst issues (basically Dawson's Creek with explosions, superpowers and graphic violence... and who wouldn't want to see Dawson explode into a grotesque mess?). If you're going to make it about middle-aged men with ridiculous salaries blowing things up, you might as well just not attach the Akira name to it.

Fear not, though Hollywood, for I have the answer to this predicament. You may have to wait another couple of years, but seeing as film's been stuck in "development hell" for years already that shouldn't be too much to ask... Jaden Smith. You can keep the general synopsis of the movie, by merely combining the Japanese biker gang culture with the LA street gang culture, and BAM! You have yourself a movie, featuring a kid who was a star before he was even in a movie thanks to his already famous parents. And you wouldn't have to worry about whether he'd be credible in action scenes... he's already the Karate Kid! (Well, Kung Fu Kid really, but that's a whole other issue).



This is Kei. The female lead of Akira. The big female name that has been connected to this role is Mila Kunis. I could actually see this working... sure, she's currently 27 years old, but I always got the impression that Kei was quite a bit older than Kaneda who was infatuated with her and followed her around. I dunno... maybe it's just my hormones speaking, as I currently believe that every movie should feature a Mila Kunis nude scene... maybe playing the lead role in the also in development hell live action Ghost In The Shell movie would be more appropriate for her.
The problem I have with what Hollywood seems to have in store for this character, though? I've seen the description of the role as "sexy, smart government agent". Government agent? Once again guys, if you're going to change everything about the movie, take the Akira name away from it!

You see, Akira is set in the year 2019. The Japanese government has taken the destruction of the original Tokyo in 1988 (obviously these dates will have to be changed) as an opportunity to take away all civil liberties, and the upcoming Olympic games set to be hosted by Neo-Tokyo is to be the country's big statement to the rest of the world. Rumours persist that it wasn't an enemy attack that destroyed Tokyo, but a mystical being known only as Akira who gained unlimited power and used it for destruction. These rumours have led to increasingly violent cults dedicated to the worship of Akira, and the actions of the government have led to an underground resistance group that plans to uncover the governments secret experiments and overthrow them. Kei is a member of this resistance group. Turning her into a "sexy, smart government agent" is making this the complete opposite of Akira.

That's the end of my rant about a movie that might possibly never come to fruition. I certainly hope it lingers in development hell just long enough for someone in Hollywood to get a clue as to what they are dealing with here... both storywise, and the fact that Akira is undoubtedly the most popular anime movie of all time (discounting Dragonball Z and Pokemon), and screwing it up will result in no one going to see it.